The first 24 hours

Beware: Lady V is keeping a diary of all the events that are happening, so expect a new best-selling novel to be soon published by Portobello Books. So far we've had:

1 very smelly old man sitting by our side on the plane, who paid for his sins by being forced to stand up every 35 minutes by Lady V's weak pelvic floor

1 kidnapping of Lady V by Homeland Security officials, who took her into a Guantanamo-like room at JFK and released her only when I started calling in support from Amnesty International

1 delightful reunion with gorgeous Gossip Girl star Sgieth and Princeton star T Borges


1 incident with a very bitchy dog that I hope will be put down or run over soon

4 visits to drinking establishments in (relatively) quick succession, including a roof-top bar under the shadow of the Empire State Building,



a faux dive bar in Brooklyn where F & C discovered they quite like hunting deer after all



and a real dive bar where a pool table gave us the opportunity to become acquainted with our first, real American trailer trash lady: Barbara from Puerto Rico (no pictures taken for security reasons)

So far, so good

I am bracing for what's next...